Thursday, July 14, 2011

Chemo Day

9:00 a.m.
I get "Franklin" ready to feed my husband. No clue when he will get another meal so I double him up. 2 Cans at once. 8 ounces of water before and after to flush.
All we know about today is that radiation is at 10:00 then chemo right across the street at 10:30. I am hustling this morning to get everything done to be On Time if not early, since we are back to back. Radiation then chemo.

We arrive at radiation early. Whew, Sandy, the sweet woman in white who was my angel Day One is there. Her cancer has spread to brain, esophagus and bone. I hadn't seen her for over a week and I was worried. She's here but looks rough. Not a good sign in the radiation clinic waiting room. Usually anyone that is looking bad is not tolerating chemo well. Sandy isn't on chemo since chemo does nothing for brain tumors. She disappears into the back when they call her name but before I can speak to her. Her husband looks worn and shell shocked. 
( I know that feeling well.)
Henry is called. His turn for radiation. 

I have become friends with so many patients and family members along the way so I sit by my newest BFF Chris. Chris is fighting AIDS and colon cancer but his sense of humor is addicting. We became fast  friends instantly. 
We chat about nails and hair and being FABULOUS. Chris was a performer and singer before he got sick. He now walks with a limp and has lost his hair. I love him. He has stage II cancer and only 3 more treatments to go. 
Please God let him be ok and go into remission. 
This world needs Chris. I need a happy ending.

Henry is finished and out of his 11th treatment and we zoom out the door with a merry wave and cheery 
Good-Bye to everyone in the waiting room. Most of my new friends now all have cancer.
We race to the Chemo Pavillion. We check in with "Debbie." 
(The name has been changed to protect the inept)
We get there 10 minutes early. Whew. 
Being late to me is a crime.
We check in and wait....
One hour goes by. Henry tells me he feels like he did before a Big 10 Tournament Game. Iced.
Time is ticking away. It's one of those "Hurry Up and Wait" moments.
Tick tock.
11:30 a.m.  Our names are still not called.
Tick tock.
12:00. Noon.
Tick tock.
I am not one to sit still. I get up and begin to pace.
Tick tock
12:30 p.m.
Two hours gone and we have SIX hours to get the chemo once we get in there!
It is now 12:45 p.m..
I can't take it!
I am ready to freak out. Why are we still in a waiting room? Why is this taking so LONG?
I walk the halls again. Pacing.  This time I must have had a very frustrated look on my angry red face.
A research doctor asks if I need help.
I unload and unload with a vengeance.
"We have been here for over two hours and we have six hours ahead of us of chemo!"
She goes to see Debbie at her desk where we first checked in.
"Did you check these people in,  Debbie?" She asks.
"Oh, I thought I did but must have forgotten!"

Oh, Good God. Let me at this nincompoop. 
I am like a deranged bovine with Mad Cow Disease. I want to gouge her eyeballs out with her inkpen! 
I am usually mild and calm. I told her where I thought she could spend eternity! 
I am certain the sun doesn't shine there!
Now, what was to be a 6 hour day just turned into an 8 hour day because some lame woman dropped the ball on him.
It doesnt hurt ME but to think this poor man has an 8 hour day ahead of him for no other reason than sheer stupidity makes me see red. Blood Red.
We are called in instantly.
Funny, the President of Public Relations comes to hold my husband's hand and gush big fat apologies. Casey Anthony is treated better. 
A glitch. Just a glitch.
Lets move forward from here.

We arrive in the long room where 15 - 20 reclining chairs are lined against a wall.  We get to pick out a pretty puke green recliner with a tv.
This is to be our home for the next 6-7 hours.
Someone forgot to tell us about the prescription for the numbing cream for the chemo port. Ouch. Again, someone dropped the ball. No prescript means a very large needle inserted into that port that was just inserted in his chest.

The area is barely numbed with ice and the needle stuck into that very sensitive skin. The bandages were just removed from that incision  yesterday! Ouch.
We take our $375.00 Emends to the clinic thinking it will be administered there. 
It can't go Down his throat because he can't swallow. Can't go into his feeding tube because it will clog the G-Tube... 
Again, someone dropped the ball. A man with a HUGE tumor in the back of his throat to swallow a very large pill? What to do? 
An hour goes by while they figure this out. An IV of Emend and a patch to be worn for a week. 
We bought the Emends for nothing. I give it to the clinic for someone who can't afford it or has no insurance. 
It'll go to good use.
It begins...
One hour of saline flush.
30 minutes of an IV of steroids.
30 minutes of Emends by IV drip.
The machine beeps when you are finished with each bag.

4:00 p.m.
The Cisplatin is finally administered.
2 hours of this.
If any of you ever have to experience this (I hope you don't!) I am telling you... Never wear heels or dress pants. 
I wore a white blouse, black dress pants and heels. Casual wear for a long day, right? 
No! Wear a Sweatsuit and sneakers. 
30 more minutes of saline to flush the kidneys and the rest of the body.

What a day!
We are to come back every Thursday for this for the next 8-10 weeks. Lovely.
I have a bad attitude today. It happens, right?
So exhausting and it's not me on radiation or chemo.
Next week I am wearing sweats and sneakers. It's butt-cold in here and uncomfortable as hell.
Gawwww. 6 hours in a chair is brutal. I can't imagine how Henry has done it. So exhausting and I am not on radiation or chemo.
Tomorrow is another day.

Thank you all for the beautiful notes and letters. I spent 4 of these hours reading your notes to my husband.  It helps more than you know. You may not know it but you are right here with us. Pull up an ugly green recliner and relax.

I'll Tell "Debbie" that you're here. Ha!


  1. Lana, It's amazing how you will bond with your chemo nurse and fellow chemo patients. I've been done with chemo for almost six months and I still look for certain people when I go to get my 6 week checkups. When Henry finishes his chemo, don't be surprised if you go through a strange kind of separation anxiety. When you see the same people every Thurs. it's like "us against the big C." Once chemo is over and you aren't regularly seeing these people you have bonded with, you feel alone. I have an online support group that I love.

    If Henry has to any injections to raise his white blood counts, see if there's a way to give him claritin the day before, day of, and day after the injection. It really helps with the bone pain caused by the injection stimulating the bone marrow.

    Wishing you and Henry all the BEST!

    (I had surgery for Ovarian cancer June '10 and completed six months of chemo the end of Jan.)

  2. Hi Lana! That sure does disgust me that you were in the waiting room for so long because of somebody else's incompetence. Welcome to the world of medicine. Been dealing it for 2 1/2 years with both of my parent's illnesses. You must be the patient advocate to get things done. Sending lots of prayers to you both. Hang in there! Be strong! Only 8-10 weeks to go! I always gave my mom the countdown during her treatments. Always great to cross another one off. Big hugs, Stacie xo

  3. I've been going through this with my Aunt. She has stage four liver and lung cancer. The six hours of chemo is BRUTAL and I don't even have to go through it. An aunt and a husband is a different thing, but I love reading your blog its nice feeling like someone has the same frustrations as me, its like your with me through all this. Sending my love to you and your incredible husband I pray for you both every night!

  4. Wow Lana...what a day, huh? I am so very sorry that you and dear sweet Henry have to go through this ordeal. I wish I had great words of wisdom and/or suggestions for you two however I am not equipped. All I can really do is pray on my knees for you two. (I will add your new friend Chris to my prayers.) God bless you both. ~ Kim

  5. One tiny step at a time, Lana. It's oh so hard. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other and live in the moment. I love you and your strength and determination. Henry is lucky to have you beside him. Treasure each other every moment.

  6. Hi Lana,

    Unbelievable the incompetence of some people that work in the medical system. I've had the long wait happen before but since then if I am not called in by 30-45 minutes I go up to the desk and keep checking. it just seems that some people do not really care about their patients. if this woman saw you sitting for that long in the waiting room then she should have done her job and checked on why. I hope next time things will go more smoothly for you and Henry. Hoping this time seems to go by quickly and that all the good effects of the treatment come through. Love and Hugs. . . Vickie

  7. Sadly your experience is more the "norm" than you can imagine....for what is a huge moneymaker the care and service should rival the Ritz and it's worse than a Motel 6. You need water and energy bars, protein something you can grab and eat in the hall if your guy dozes. Idiots like the one at the desk deserve every bit of your anger and letting it out is justifiable, if they were in your heels they'd be yelling to high heaven. Sic Paris on her and she won't forget to check you in again!


  8. Lana what an emotional roller coaster for you. But you are getting through it and doing a wonderful job for your husband. Just keep focusing on Henry getting better and forget the rest.

    Love to you both...

    Sue xxx

  9. God Bless Lana. You are an AMAZING Woman! My Thoughts and Prayers are with you and your husband. xoxo

  10. God Bless you both. I'm still praying for you daily. Hugs ♥

  11. Wow, "Debbie" is a moron! How is it that a beautiful person like you gets thrown in the path of completely ignorant, insensitive, incompentant people?! First it is the horrid secretary from the doctors office and now it is the forgetful bitty at the chemo place. Goodness gracious! "I must have forgotten." IS NOT ACCEPTABLE. 30 minutes, MAYBE... but hello...2 hours is insane!

    ::la sigh:: :-\ Those sound like some very long, dull days ahead. At least now you both know to dress comfy.

    I'm keeping you and Henry in my thoughts

  12. I'm still praying for you both and I won't stop
    Tammi Marie

  13. Well lean forward while I take a seat in my puke green lazy boy, and let me apologize for my profession. I couldn't agree with you more, I swear I don't know how some of these people wipe their butt. It's sad but true, that every time I have to go to an ER, I make sure they know from the get go, I'm an ER nurse. One time I didn't tell them, I had been in a really bad car accident, and had a collapsed lung, broken sternum and broken ribs. They left me alone in a back room for about 3 and a half hours, no pain meds, no vital signs. When my husband was out of the room, I climbed out of the stretcher and was going to look for him, to take me to the ER I worked at, so at least I could get pain meds, and in my mind at that point, at least die with pain meds in me. I collapsed on the floor and a doctor found me. Boy as soon as they found out I was a nurse, they couldn't do enough. Doesn't that just make you want to puke? Anyway, I digress, still love you guys, if you ever want me to entertain y'all with "Weird Tales of the ER" just give me a call. In the mean time, I'm going over and light a candle for y'all and pray. Love you, still stranded up here,

    flopo :)

  14. Please light your candle and say your prayer for Lana and Henry

  15. Lana,

    Just reading about your account of today's schedule exhausts me. Poor Henry, I am so sorry he has to go through all of this. I'm sure he feels at rock bottom about now.

    I'm going to tell you a short story. About two years ago, my then 26 y/o daughter, Bernadette experienced a very horrible time in her life. She called me on the phone one evening sobbing and said to me, "Mom I just can't take this anymore. I give up". No matter what I said to her, I could not bring any comfort to her. My heart was broken.

    It was then in my mind I heard from God. He was reminding me of something I had read in His word. In Philippians, he reminded me that I could do everything through him who gives me strength. So not knowing what else I could say to help Bernadette, I just told her what God said in that verse.

    The longest time went by and Bernadette remained quiet. Not one peep came out of her mouth. I really thought she was just going to tell me she had to go, but that did not happen. Instead she responded with, "well Mom, God must think I'm pretty strong then".

    I think that was the day that verse came alive for the both of us. The light came on so to speak. God doesn't think we are weak. Quite the contrary, He knows we are strong. That's because He has our back. We are strong because He is our strength. Don't lose sight of that.

    We can do everything through Christ who gives us strength. Speak those words out loud every minute of the day if you need to because there is power in the word of God. It is alive.

    I love you guys and will continue to pray for strength for the both of you,

    PomMomLisa <3

  16. Thank you for the update, your in my heart and I am praying for you both for strenght. All of us care so that karma is working the universe for you ;-). Get some rest. Jill

  17. Lana, my family and I are praying for Henry and for you and your family. I can't imagine how difficult all of this is for all of you. I know that Henry has a long road ahead of him, but tell him we're praying for him! Much love to both of you!

  18. We all care so much. Hugs

  19. I'm from Jersey. Where I come from, that kid of ineptitude and unkindness through dispassion will get you planted in a landfill or under the cement floor of some union officers garage...

    Im so sorry you both went through so much lack of communication. I have found, in my own minor battle, that unless my face is in front of them--they do not give a rats ass. When I am there, in all my five foot two Jersey acks scented glory, shit.gets.done.

    I want to be there to run interference for you because apathetic people are worst that hateful people. They hurt people and don't even register it in their minds.

    Huge mental spiritual and emotional hugs for you. As selfish as it sounds, you help me every day.I hope my prayers for comfort help you and your strong husband

  20. Lana and Henry:

    Courage. You have it and we admire your strenght. You will get through this. We are all praying for you.


  21. You know what Lana I thInk I look forward to your post more than your videos. I feel I am right there with you. You truly are a page turning author! You leave me always wanting more. I only wish it was fiction you were writing :( you really are gifted with your words. Thank you for such personal photos and letting us into your life. It really is a slap in the face that this is real. Next time bring one of your own fabulous throws and show them what a difference to the psyche just a touch of Fabulous can do for healing power !!

  22. Ciao Lana,

    Still keeping you in my prayers as always.

    I'm so sorry that you had to wait that long to get the treatment... but who knows... maybe the poor lady always had her own problems, the same as everyone, and simply forgot. I don't know what her deal was... but it could happen. Maybe someone she holds dear is going though something too. Who knows!! But I do understand... waiting for two hours is truly a long time, esp when you are sick yourself.

    Anyway... I am keeping you and your husband in my prayers, and in my thoughts at all times.

    If you take care of yourself and walk with integrity, you may be confident that God will deal with those who sin against you. Above all, don’t give birth to sin yourself; rather, pray for those who persecute you. God will one day turn your persecution into praise. – Warren Wiersbe

    I lite another candle for you and said another prayer there on the site as well. I see that the site grew since the last time that I was there and had a candle going... my oh my... there are a lot if candles there now... thats so wonderful. What a blessing.. indeed!!

    Love you Lana and your husband too.

    Sending you lots of Hugs & Kisses

  23. Big ((((hugs))) to you and Henry. That nurse needs a new occupation. It royally pisses me off that they can make mistakes like that. This isnt a BLEAPING hair appointment here. We are talking about someones life!!!!!!!!! You dont mess with someones life like that and if you cant make sure you are giving every patient the impeccable attention they deserve you better find yourself another job. What the hell is wrong with the healthcare industry? I would have wanted to beat the snot outta her too. But she is not worth your energy. I am sure you will see her again and i would stare her down till it burns and she crawls under that rock where she belongs. Crap like that makes my blood boil. I really feel for your husband. I know how hard it is what he is going through and he is feeling worse than he has ever felt in his life. The treatments have been and will be debilitating. Dont let that poor excuse of a nurse take any of your precious energy. press forward and stay strong. we are here with you... have you both in my thoughts every single day. Thank you for keeping us updated. Your pictures reminded me of my experience 20 years ago. Yep 20 years strong cancer free stage 4a cancer. Mine was different than Henry's. You can beat this!! I will be here every day checking in. You take care of you and take care of Henry. We are here to hold you both up. Faith, Hope and Love, Anita aka LaLaBella5a (youtube)

  24. Well you did it Lana, you made me laugh! At the end when you said to pull up the ugly green recliner and you will tell Debbie we are here! I would love to get my hands on that Debbie : ( What a horrific day for both of you. Lana, you are allowed to have bad days. You cannot stay 100% positive all of the time. That is perfectly alright for you to have your days. I wish I could take away your pain and Henrys disease. I HATE CANCER! Not that anyone likes it but it makes me so frustrated when I think about this horrible disease. I guess I am having a bad day too! Tomorrow is a new day with new challenges but you will get throught them. You will regain your strength. Put on your sweatpants and sneakers and sit your cutee little butt in those ugly green recliners next to your strong man! I cant wait for the day when you are back in your bathroom making your Youtube videos. As always prayers, thoughts, and a ton of love are with you and Henry! Talk soon my friend! xoxoxox

  25. What a day!
    Cancer sucks!
    If anyone can kick its a**, it is you & Henry as a team!
    Go team!
    TY for the updates & pix.
    *big hugs*


    Sending more love and prayers to you both!


  27. I love you Lana xo

  28. Lana, my thoughts and prayers are going out for you and your husband. (((angel hugs)))

  29. When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. ~Franklin D. Roosevelt

    sending from my heart to yours a whole lot of love and some Florida sunshine to warm your beautiful souls. I am hanging in there with you. Faith, Hope and Love Anita aka LaLaBella5a

  30. I want to be mad right with you, Lana! OMG - Debbie needs to be strapped to that ugly puke green chair and sent to Siberia!!!

    Henry is so blessed to have you by his side through all of this. It has made me appreciate my husband more, give him extra hugs and kisses and tell him I love him many times a day. Still praying for you both! xooxxxo

  31. Lana, your husband and you are still in my prayers. I pray these treatments go by quickly for him. It'll all work out in the end. You're both strong people!

  32. Love you Lana! You have such patience, I would have kicked that receptionists ass after 30 minutes. I hope it doesn't happen again! Stay strong Henry! I am sorry you are in so much pain, you are very brave, chemo and radiation is a tough road. Just want you to know you have so many people who love you and your wife, even if we've never met. As I'm sitting her writing this, I think about using the word love in regards to someone I've never met, and I was getting worried it sounded creepy, but what the heck, right?! There is nothing wrong with love. Loving and caring is what you both need, and that's what I'm going to give. So take care, we love you, and we all are thinking of you!

  33. Lana, when all this is over and Henry is recovered (he will be - he has to be - his public expect it!) you must turn your blog into a book. I guarantee it will be a huge hit and be an inspiration to everyone.

    Please kick 'Miss Not-up-to-the-job' on the ankle. Just where was her brain and why is she doing that job?

    Yes, go with the sweatpants and sneakers next time - you'll still look a million dollars!

    We love you Lana - and Henry has such a huge fan base now, he's gotta pull through!

    Love, hugs and prayers
    Lou xxxx

  34. Dearest Lana, The level of incompetence you describe is what I have to deal with on a daily level.......I become very 'emotionally charged' when it happens 4 or 5 times a day, I mean.....I ask you????? Each and every one of us here will think as you did, how can Henry be forgotten about, not to be booked in properly when you are right there under that silly woman's nose?!!!!! You know Lana, it is astounding....some people actually make stupidity look like a freaking virtue! Grrrrrrrrrr. Thank you for sharing your experience with us Lana, thank Henry for being the way he is, the wonderful man that you love and I thank God for your constant inner strength and fighting spirit because that will see you both through this ugly journey. Speaking with other patients will help you and Henry not to feel so isolated and share concerns, worries, fears and good outcomes too. If that is Henry in the last photo - that damned ugly chair clashes beautifully with his trousers and shirt. On a serious note, Henry is in enough pain without an incompetent moronic woman messing up a simple enough task - she won't do that again, will she????? Hugs and lots of love to you both. Leyla xxxooo

  35. Lana, thanks for the update, I wait every day to hear how you and Henry are doing. I understand it must be very frustrating to meet people like "Debbie" people that doesn't seem to care but still working with people that really needs her to care. I hope and pray for you and Henry! Hugs for you both.

  36. I am a long way away in England but reading your thoughts makes me almost feel I am there. I so felt for you both being around incompetent people. This surely is one area of medicine where only the most on the ball people have any place, so disappointed for you. You certainly dont need the extra hassle. Hope your next experience is better. Carole x

  37. Ah I see my friend Cyberlady has left a message!

    Wow, just ready about your day at the clinic. Sadly there are two many Debbies around. Quite a few at the eye hospital that my colleagues aunt was at. What is it? General incompetance or don't give a toss - or both. I work in an area full of these types. Luckily my colleague is there to sort everything out whle they flap their hands about or walk up and down the corridor chatting loudly on theer mobiles. Luckily they do not work in a clinic!

    Thinking of you and hubbie

  38. How can that kind of incompetence be tolerated? To put a desperately I'll person through that... That is a classic example of a person who does not realize the impact her performance has on the lives of others. I say goodbye Debbie! Having the right person in that position makes all the difference in the care of patients. You get to see it all, huh Lana? Maybe there will be some rest for you somewhere. Heart u! Connie

  39. Lana... I know you are sweet, but I know you are fierce! After going thru cancer with my husband for 3 years (and counting...) I have learned the squeaky wheel gets oiled. Always ask after 30 minutes if they have any idea how much longer it will be, with a sweet smile of course! I do wonder how "Debbie" didn't notice how long you'd been don't exactly fade into the background! Once my dad was in the ER for meningitis, and he was shivering and so ill, and I finally went up to the desk and told them he needs to be seen NOW...and within about one minute he was called back. Not my personality, but sometimes desperate times call for you to kick some booty!
    Keep hanging in there Lana...Henry is one lucky man to have you at his side. Praying for you both daily!


    P.S. I wonder if Chanel makes a sweatsuit you could wear next time? Keep warm!

  40. Hey sweet Lana and dear Henry,

    Not to excuse "Debbie's" behavior at all - but was thinking maybe it was karma's way of giving you permission to finally get angry and let it out!!! So sorry you had to go through all the incompetance - it seems like it's on-going in alot of medical situations (again, not an excuse). Sending love, love, love, love and more love with giant doses of positive thoughts. Thank you so much for the update - thinking of you both all the time. Hugs xxxxx Eva

  41. Lana~
    I know all about waiting in rooms for hours for chemo treatments. Four years ago, I was present for every treatment that my good friend endured in her battle against pancreatic cancer. At M.D. Anderson it was an examining table for her and a hard plastic chair for green recliners there. You are right about the clothing....we soon wore flats, comfortable slacks and a sweater because it was always freezing! We shared together our deepest thoughts, hopes and dreams as the chemo waged its war against the evil cancer. We pulled the sweetness out of every moment of those long hours of waiting. I don't think I ever knew the meaning of the word "wait" before that. My heart is with you in more ways than you know. You are not alone but surrounded by a great army of family and friends who love you beyond belief and are in this battle with you and Henry. You are precious to me and I send hugs for your heart and kisses for your beautiful face!

  42. Lana-I'm so sorry that you had to deal with someone like "Debbie." There's no excuse for such incompetence.I have a feeling though that that was the bottom and you and Henry are only going up from there. Take care of yourself-we're all praying for you and Henry.

  43. God bless you and prayers daily are for you two. May this nightmare be over soon. We all love you Lana. Please never forget that.

  44. Lana - it has been several months since I've checked in with your blog. Having read thru all these posts, let me say I am in tears.
    Thank God Henry has you there to be his advocate.
    Prayers for healing and comfort ascend!

  45. I am appalled, but not surprised. Once I took my son to the hospital because he had inhaled a piece of carrot. I was told it was really late and the specialist wanted to get home, he was going on vacation for 2 weeks. They actually told me to come back if it was still bothering him in 2 weeks! I also have a medical background and I know that it is very serious, he could have gotten an infection and died. I stood my ground and off to the O.R they took my son, when they brought him out they said they were so surprised to see such a large carrot in his bronchial tube. I wasn't, he could hardly breath. Dumb fu..s.
    Stand your ground, don't wait to be looked after, some people are to stupid to deserve your
    Much love and hugs to you and Henry.

  46. Lana
    you and your husband are in my thoughts everyday. Much love

  47. Keeping you two in my prayers, and adding your new friends, too. My love to you and Henry. I can't help thinking that your next visit will be much better delt with because...
    A. Debbie will be replaced or...
    B. Debbie will be kissing your butt

    When my son was in the hospital last year, I lived in sweats the whole time. Kentucky University keeps their hospital COLD. It helps to keep the germs away. I had to laugh because it was like 90 degrees and 90% humidity outside, and here I was in a sweatsuit, lol.

    Hugs to you.

  48. I went through this with my Mother, but for her it was breast cancer. Its hard, but try to stay positive. I believe that it is one of the best medicines. Love to you both!


  49. Lana, today I'm sending you a great big bear hug and a sloppy kiss on the cheek, something tells me that's what you need, and give Henry a great big virtual hug and kiss, I know he's sore so I'll just keep it "virtual" till he's well.

    Please light your candle and say your prayer for Lana and Henry here:

  50. Lana, when Dad had chemo, he was in the hospital for three days a week, for three months in a row. They sure do things different now. (At least in the hospital, he was in a bed...) But oh, the cancer floor was one of the saddest places I've ever been in my life. I'd walk down the hall to Dad's room, tears streaming down my face, and wipe them away before I got in his room. As for "Debbie," all I can do is shake my head. I cannot understand how people get through life or keep a job being so incompetent. It's too bad you couldn't have kicked her right in the behind! I'm so sorry you guys went through that. Was Henry cold during his treatment? If he ever is, ask for a blanket. He's going through enough without being cold. I feel so sorry for anyone going through chemo/radiation. I would cry seeing Dad's marked up body. Cancer is one of the sneakiest, cowardly, evil diseases ever. And I'm hoping someday, someone will find a cure. (Like you said, cancer is "big money..") I'm still praying for you and Henry, and I'm sending you sparkles, twinkles, confetti, pixie dust, hugs, light and love. God Bless You both. And take care.

  51. Lana Bo Bana...sorry for Dumb@ss Debbie...sorry for ugly green chairs...sorry for liquid food and needles and chemo...and sorry for cancer most of all. But YAY for hope and love and prayers and another day together and YAY for the will to fight it and WIN. I hear it in your posts...each time you sound stronger, more informed, more gusty, less scared and more "kick butt"...Henry is lucky to have you, and vice versa. Love conquers all. Even cancer. We are with you both. XOX

    Calvikingchick YT

  52. Just checking in with you guys letting you know I am still here with you. Thinking of you both on a daily basis. Does it seem odd to be thinking of people i never met?? But its true. I am heartbroken for the both of you. Lana i feel soooo connected to you through your videos you are such a genuine, beautiful person inside and out. It literally broke my heart to see you cry. I seriously was up all night a few days ago catching up on your blog. Tears streaming down my face and all. I have asked my mother God Bless her Soul to send you a ray of sunshine enveloped with Angel Kisses from me and to watch over you. Stay strong you can beat this Henry. I was 23 diagnosed with cancer in stage 4a I know how you feel. its the absolute worst. I remember my dad took me to all of my appointments. Sat with me for countless hours and then had to drive all the way home after. It takes a lot of energy sitting in those damn places. But i got pretty good at playing cribbage LOL. Not something you see most 20 somethings doing. But hey it passes the time. We watched a lot of movies and did crosswords and definitely wore our most comfy clothes. They told me then that i would never have children due to the amount of chemo i was getting. My cancer was in its later stages as well and treatment was vigorous. I remember feeling soooo sick all of the time and the taste in my mouth from those drugs. I dont know why but i could taste it. Awful stuff. They always gave me a bag of stuff before my treatments for nausea or whatever. Guess it helped some but wouldnt really know any different felt like shit anyways. I got down to about 90 lbs. but i beat that ugly C word and so can you Henry. They told me i would never have kids and guess what i was blessed with 2. a boy and a girl. They are now 15 and 11. I have been cancer free for 20 years. You can do it HENRY. When you get to the end of your rope tie a knot and HANG ON!! and if that knot comes undone I will toss you another rope along with a ton of other people. We are all pulling for you!! Faith, Hope & Love, Anita (LaLaBella5a)

  53. Oh boy, the memories....gee in Toronto they have those same aqua green chairs. Does yours make that embarrasing "squish" sound when you sit in them?
    Now Henery you and Lana have alot of living and love'n left. When it seems that you can not, or you do not want to make it, it is then by the by the grace of God you do. He will gives you, Lana and all of your family and friends all that you need to do what is next.
    Please try, try a decade of the the rosary. Even one Hail Mary. There is something so soothing and comforting knowing that Mary, a blessed mother will interceed for you and bring your prayers to her son. (Shes got more pull then us down here ;)


  54. UGH! My Dad just finished 6 months of chemo. He had to be there 3 hours, then took a pump home that he wore until the 3rd day where I took him back to the clinic to have it removed. The cancer is a wait and see thing, but they removed his port for now. He's an otherwise very healthy young 58. When I'd take him in, I'd check him at the desk and make sure those ladies saw my face constantly until his turn. What a drag. Prayers with you, hang in there.

  55. Hi Lana. I'm glad I was'nt with you, because I would of ripped into Debbie,I bet she won't pull that stunt again!! All I can say is thank goodness its the week end for you and Henry. Please get some rest. Izzy can bring alot of comfort too. I think animals have a 6th sense when it comes to us humans, their such a blessing. Take care friend, Klaire ((HUGS))

  56. Debbie sucks. If it were me, I would've punched her in the face...or thrown a shoe at her. ha..

    Hopefully the next few weeks will go by quickly and as easily as possible...and of course here's to hoping the chemo will kick the shit out of those tumors. Doctors don't know everything. They only know what they're taught.

    Good luck Henry.. Kick that cancer's ass! Stay tough Lana, give those nitwit incompetents hell! =)

    <3, Terri aka *lilblondehooker*

  57. Hi Henry & Lana! Just checking in to offer up more prayers for you both. Sending my love & a big hug, too.


  58. Just popping back through to let y'all know I'm still here, thinking about y'all and praying.

  59. Pray tonight and I know your husband will get better because today is an especially nice night

  60. Lana,
    Today I threw a fit about my plans being canceled to go somewhere with a friend. I had a "woe is me" attitude because my life is "oh so hard". Thank you for helping me realize that I should not be sitting here pouting, you and hubby are going through hell right now, if anyone deserves to complain,it's you! I've got your back girl. I hate that you're going through this! Just remember, you are NOT alone! Hugs to you, hang in there Lana.

  61. i certainly won't tell debbie i'm here, you'll never see me! the upside of chemo for 6-7 hours is that at the end you get to go home and you don't have to have him staying in a hospital. i hope everything works out well for you two, both of you need a vacation with a big fat margarita (non-alcoholic if you must :P) your hubby is doing good, he is keeping up with it...too bad about the port needle those things are big i have had to put them in people... and without numbing gel ouchie! (and maybe a few expletives)

  62. Debbie the douchebag!!! still praying everyday and you both are in my thoughts xxxxxxx

  63. Please be careful with the numbing cream over his port. Over time the cream can become a place for bacteria to grow and it can have a direct entrance into his already weakened immune system through his blood stream. Make sure after the cream is applied they scrub really good with the antibacterial swabs, or a good option it lidocaine a tiny pinch with effects almost instantly so no waiting 45 min for cream to work. Praying for you both.

  64. We are all pulling for you Henry. God must be getting bombed with so many prayers. That is what friends are for. To support in times of hardship. You two have many friends in internet land. Real people behind those dumb screens, lol. You are so strong and still fighting. Go for the touch down, come on you can do it!
    Love you guys (((((((((((((BIG HUG))))))))))))))
    PS: I loved the pics. Makes me feel like I am right there.

  65. my poor lana.. i just found out about this tragedy. please hang in there.. be strong.. the more positive you stay the better you can help. i subscribed and will read your blogs. I started blogging too.. mostly about my stress at work.. xo love, amy

  66. Lana,
    I feel terrible that you and your husband are going through this difficult time!
    we have a 13 year old boy here in my Town who told his Mom he couldnt go to school one day because he wasnt feeling good.. His mom took him to the ER, They tried sending him home but his mom wasnt having it! She demanded more test be done.. They found out he has Stage three Bone cancer:(
    I'll continue to say my prayers everyday for you& your family. Please give that wonderful Husband a big hug for me!.. Big hugz to you as well Lana. We need a cure for Cancer YESTERDAY!!
    Thinking of you in Maine..

  67. Hey sweet girl,

    I had a "Debbie" the day I was officially diagnosed with muscular dystrophy. Sometimes we just have to forgive.

    I am in love with Henry. :) Y'all's crazy love for each other is incredible to read about. Lana, I know you love the frilly, girly stuff, but you have some real backbone. Both of you do.

    Henry, you're gonna make it. I just sense it. I think the athlete in you knows what it takes to win the big games. I'm in the stands cheering you on.

    I'm sure you lift weights. You know how you do your set and then your trainer always says "one more?" You know it's number 11 that gives you the greatest gains, yet it takes everything you have to do it. Over time, you see the results.

    You know your mental attitude has so much to do with it. You approach the bench, and you think those thoughts. You either make or break your workout session before you even sit down. This has to be even more true with the chemo chairs.

    I know this has got to be scaring you to death right now. You're the one that has to do the healing work. You've got a good woman and a stadium full of fans. I believe 100% that you're gonna pull this off.

    Sending love and healing energy from Texas to both of you...

  68. Dear Lana, I think of you often and I am there with you, the chemo makes you feel sick,i know the feeling, it takes a lot of patience, but the goal is a closer. hold on. hug both Lisa (Italy)

  69. "Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." Christopher Robin

  70. Still here still praying

    Please light your candles and say your prayers for Lana and Henry here:

  71. All the best to you and Henry, Lana. It might not be the same, but I can sympathize to some degree. I was in a car accident in 1992... broke my neck and my back. I spent months in the hospital, three of which I wore a halo brace (it kept my neck immobilized so it could heal... definitely looks like a medieval torture device). The care I received was by turns phenomenal and awful. I've spent the last 19 years using a wheelchair, but I'm here!

    And I have a cat who was diagnosed with lymphoma a few years ago. He went through chemo and has been just fine ever since. But you wouldn't believe the transformation in that cat when he goes to the vet now. He's the sweetest cat I've ever had... doesn't bite, scratch, and I've never heard him hiss. He just purrs and purrs. Take him to the vet, though, and he turns into demon cat, and they have to muzzle him or risk getting mauled.

    If he sees the cat carrier, he runs and hides. My husband and I figure he's just experienced too much pain (needles and such).

    I hope and pray that you and your husband stay just as feisty yet still just as sweet as my precious baby cat... and that you get through this just like the two of us got through our hardest times.

  72. Lana, you have always, always been my star to look for on YouTube! I am very sad that you and your Beloved are going through this experience, and I am praying!!! Thank you for writing out the experience to us - it helps you, to 'talk' about it, I know that from my own caregiving experiences; and, too, it helps others, so that people don't feel so alone. And that "Debbie"! I've bunked into several like her in my day - here, let me tell you a story:

    When I lived in Va, my doctor was very concerned that every time I got a cold, it almost instantly became bronchitis or pneumonia, so he told me the next time I got the first sniffle, to call his office and request that he call in an antibiotic ...

    I did that. And the "Debbie" at the desk spat into the phone: "You can't order them like a pizza!"

    I made an appointment instead.

    And of course by the time I got in there, I had bronchitis ... the doctor asked why I hadn't done what he asked?! "I did!" I coughed on him, and explained what had happened ...

    He stared at me. He was incredulous. He started to stammer out an apology, stopped, and said, "Jean! Why - why aren't you upset?! Look how sick you are!"

    I cough-laughed and said, "Dr, it's too stupid to get upset over!" ;)

    Love you,

  73. Lana and Henry, I'm just sending you strength and peace. You both continue to be on my mind. May you both shine on. Slade.

  74. Lana, you and your husband have been on my thoughts all this time. Sending you all my love from Greece. Stay strong.


  76. Oh Lana my heart just breaks for you and your darling husband. I'm praying for you both. You are in Gods hands and He is our comforter. Lean on the Lord Lana. He will get you through this trying time. I can't stay away from this blog! I laugh with you and cry with you every day. Big warm hugs to you both. Vonee

  77. Lana,
    Let Debbie know we're all there with ya and we're all gonna line up and kick her in the shin!! Geesh!!!
    I just wanted you to know I'm still sending prayers and love from Western Ky!! Hope it's making it's way up to you and your husband.
    And I agree with everyone else...rock those sweatpants'll look amazing!!!!!

  78. Dearest Lana, You and Henry and in my thoughts and prayers, hoping for good news and the route out of this horrible nightmare you are both going through. Warm hugs to you both, Leyla xxxooo

  79. Olá Lana!

    I'm on another continent, an ocean away, but my thoughts are with you both.

    My mother had one of those "thinguies" in her chest, it helped her, because her veins were all "broken" from all the medicine she had to take. It wasn't easy, but we found a plus side, I could hold her hands, and she could use her arms to spoil me with all the care, kisses and pets, has she always did.
    I hope you both fund a plus side also.

    You remind me so much of my father. He became my mother's keeper.

    I learned a lot from my mother's battle with cancer. I learnt that true love exists. And I can see it again in your battle. :)

    Warm hugs to you both from Portugal **

  80. Lana I am amazed at the way Debbie" treated you. I mean you might forget to bring your umbrella but at your job you just don't "forget"patients ...I don't know how you controlled yourself. I am praying everyday and you and Henry are always on my mind. I do believe in Miracles and I do hope God has one in the making for you. I love you dearly . Susie ~

  81. Hello, Lana and Henry ~ You two continue to be on my mind...and I say a little prayer every time I think of you.

    About Doofus Debbie....let's hope that she felt terrible about what she did; let's hope she had trouble sleeping that night. If it bothered her, it would mean that she cares about the people she "helps." I hope she apologized. I fault the management there too. In this kind of situation, you would think there would be some kind of backup plan in make sure people don't have to ever sit for more than 10 or 15 minutes. I wish some people cared more and had more compassion, but one thing I know for sure, there are so many people who love you two.

    'til next time,
    Mary Sue

  82. God Bless you and Henry..remember you are not alone....I prayed for you two in Church today, as I do everyday. Keep the faith Lana...and that wonderful sense of humor of yours. Love to you from California..xoxoxo...

  83. Lana and Henry, I think of you two everyday. May this time fly and be of the past. And the beautiful future be close at hand. Hugs

  84. Stopping in to let you know I'm praying for strength for you guys tonight, I know you have a long week ahead of you. We're all praying for y'all.

    Lana and Henry's candles:

  85. Lana, My heart goes out to you. I read your blogs so hoping that I find something good to grab on to. I can't imagine. I want you to know that I am praying for your husband and you. Please believe that it is going to be all right. You have all of us, and God to lean on. We are here honey, don't you forget that. Much Aloha, Rene

  86. Morning Hugs from Florida,

    Sending you both my thoughts and prayers and letting you know i am still here. Looking forward to the day when this nightmare is over for you and all of this becomes a bad memory and a part of your past. May the power of family, friendship, support and love give you all that you need to carry you through this truly horrific time in your life. You have many supporters out here in cyber world. Faith, Hope and Love, Anita (LaLaBella5a)

  87. Dearest Lana, Just taking some time out to see if there is any news from you. I hope you and Henry had some respite over the weekend. Henry is one lucky man to have you by his side. You have all the warmth and femininity a man wants from his wife and all the backbone and 'oomph' he needs with the all too many 'Debbies' we all come across in life. I have so much admiration for you Lana, for both of you. No matter what you wear Lana, whether it is Chanel or a bin liner, you will still look a million dollars, bless you. Warm hugs and kisses to you both, I love you more than you know. Praying for your ongoing strength and some good news, please God. Leyla xxxooo

  88. This comment has been removed by the author.

  89. Lana and Henry
    I have been following your post and cried and laughed at some of the funny things Lana has written. Both of you are Gems and we are so blessed to have you even if it is thru a Blog and Post. Thank you for sharing your life with us and I pray that GOD is with you every step of this journey. Lana I have faith that Henry will have many more Key Lime trees to hang oranges and lemons from and will continue to bring laughter into your Life. I leave you with this Prayer

    " Father In the name of your son Jesus I place in your hands Lana and Henry as you already know they are in a fight for life and need your help, please help them and give Henrys' mind and body strength. Let the love that they both share provide them with enough reasons to continue the battle and overcome. And send your loving comfort to both of them.. So that they can remain focus and strong to beat this Illness. Thank you Father!

    PS>> Debbie needs a swift kick in the rear end and Lana you are the right Girl to do it!

  90. Still praying and thinking of you both. Big hugs,~Marilyn

  91. hello Lana - I'm worried -we havent had an update from you in several days. I'm praying for you both and keeping you in my thoughts. Missi xoxo

  92. I'm still here too. I hope and pray y'all are having a better week, but I'm realistic enough to realize y'all are just now getting into the thick of things, there is so much to pray for, I just sent them up and let God take aim.

    Lana and Henry's candles:

  93. Dearest Lana and Henry, Just to let you both know I am still thinking of you, my thoughts and prayers are with you. I know there's yet another chemo' session coming up soon but just think of it as one more ticked off and you're nearer to the finish line and please God, by then you will both be feeling much better. Lots of people from around the world are praying for you both, there is so much love for you from all of us here. Keep your spirits up and keep up the fight!! Warm hugs, Leyla xxxooo

  94. Hi Lana,

    I've been following your story from the beginning and I love your humor and spirit. Much love to you and Henry.

    San Diego, CA

  95. Lana and Henry,

    Just wanted you to know I am still thinking of you and praying that each day is something you can "check off" and go forward. Love to all!

  96. What yayayoga said...I'm still here too, still praying. We still love you. I am worried that you haven't updated. I don't mean to put any pressure on you, you know how people are, nature hates a vacuum. So when I don't hear anything, I imagine the worse, but praying for the best.

  97. Dear Lana and Henry,

    I KNOW things have to be hectic, but I wanted you to know that I too am still thinking about you all and praying non-stop!

    PLEASE update us as soon as you're able, Lana! We hope that you're hanging in there -- but worried sick about what is going on since you've been so silent.....BUT, many people do say no news is good news, sure hope this is true now!!


  98. It may not be any comfort, but tell Henry I'm not enjoying food at all. I started a diet back in Feb, and though I'm doing well on it, when I do give myself a cheat day like today, nothing tastes the same. I don't know what happened, but I take a few bites and I'm done, things just aren't as good as I remember, it's really weird, so I take a little bit of the few things I still enjoy. One of them is Ben and Jerry's "Cherry Garcia", that tastes the same. Do you think he could have a little ice cream? Maybe just kind of let melt in his mouth, then swallow it when it melts. Anyway, just tell him to focus on the maybe one are two things that are still good right now. I'm not even sick and food has lost it's luster. Please let me know how he's doing.

    the Floridian stuck on the northern ice flow.

    Your friend,

  99. Lana and Henery,
    I wanted to you both to know that your in my continued thoughts and Prayers!.. I Was checking in for updates to find out how he was doing.. I hope n Pray everything is going as good as it can for you both.. Lot's of Love and Prayers.. I have a prayer Chain going around on FB for you.. Big Hugzz ~Angie~

  100. Dear Lana and Henry, You are both in my daily and nightly prayers. Last night, I dreamt I saw you both out and about with your grandchildren. I ran over and gave you a big hug Lana, and Henry was well and wanted you to hurry. You were taking the children out for ice cream. How cool is that? with much love and prayers,~Marilyn

  101. Sorry Lana. I just smiled because I thought of somewhere else that is cold and uncomfortable to sit for 6 hours for most people. Yup, a plane. The irony wasn't lost on me.

    On a helpful note, I think a few of the things I take on red eyes and long hauls will help.
    1. Seat cushion if the seats are hard
    2. Packable down jacket/vest to help keep temperatures up. Or wrap for the ladies.
    3. Snacks for you or your belly will tell everyone of its hunger. Inappropriate given the circumstance.
    4. Earplugs and eye shade. Possibly a neck pillow. Rest even if he can't fall asleep. Meditation might help and I doubt it hurts
    5. Some entertainment if nothing on tv appeals. A mobile MiFi 3g/4g device might help if there's no wifi and he'd like to watch games or read the news.

  102. My heart aches for both of you. I can't believe that you have to go through more pain from the stupidity of others. I hope and pray this doesn't happen again. I remember how bad it is sitting around waiting for a loved one. I couldn't be with my Mother all the time since I had to work. She had to take a bus that the hospital provided to get back and forth for treatments. It was a 10 hour day for her. Your so right to dress in the most comfortable clothing that you have. I wish I could help you but I can't physically be with you. You have all my prayers and love.

  103. It's Wednesday and Yes, Im checking in on you and your wonderful Hubby<3 Thinking and Praying of you everyday.. I Cant imagine the Pain, Fear, Frustration and Anger this is Causing but no matter what You have us and Your love for one another.. God bless.. Hugzz from Maine. Love You both,Angie


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