What's in the Future?

What does the future hold for anyone? 
We go thru each day doing our daily activities and never know what the future will hold. We have been experiencing a Time Warp of a Future on Crack! We don't know what we will be doing tomorrow, the next day or even next week. 
I blew up my car. Do we buy a new one or do I stick with my Company Car even tho I'm not doing "company" things? Do I even need a car right now? Does that even matter? 
In the Grand Scheme of thing....No!


Tomorrow is the PET Scan which is a full-body scan to see what's going on inside you. They inject you with a mixture of radiation dye and glucose. No carbs or sugars the night before or you will overload. They leave that hot-juice in your body for 1 hour then run you thru the scan to detect anything and everything inside you. 
If this cancer has spread beyond the head and neck, we are FUCKED! Sorry but it's the only way I care to describe it.

Yesterday, we were to attend our friends daughter's gala wedding but instead, we went to look for cemetery plots. Not that we are not being positive here, we are just being REAL.  
I had shopped and searched for the perfect dress for the last 2 weeks for this wedding. It was crucial that I have the right style and look like class. Everyone we know was invited.
 A gorgeous Zac Posen dress was in my possession with cute Jimmy Choo shoes to match. I was giddy with excitement. You know how it is when you feel your outfit for that upcoming special event looks good on you and you just know you will feel confident and the stress of being worried about your style is non existent. Ha!
That dress and shoes don't mean a thing. Handbags and lipsticks? They mean zilch.
JuicyTuesday wrote me a note and told me something that really sticks in my head....
Health is Wealth
I will write that again.... 
Health is Wealth.

Anyway, back to Zac Posen.
I told a dear friend of mine that we were going to spend our day on Saturday not going to the wedding but instead going to find Eternal resting places side by side. She gave me one very good idea...
Wear the Zac Posen to the cemetery! 
I did just that. 
My darling husband, Jimmy Choo, Zac Posen and I all traipsed thru the serene grounds and we found the perfect place. 
You may think I am being morbid. It wasn't at all. It was actually very peaceful and had a comforting presence there among the tall trees and beautiful quiet of flowers and silence. We found a spot near a sloping hill with sunshine and whispering trees nearby.

I hope all of you don't get depressed by my blog. It's theraputic for me. I am usually crying big tears as I type. It's also a way for me to express my thoughts and give family and far away friends an update. I know I need to announce this to my wonderful YouTube viewers in a video but I am so raw right now, I'm not sure I can. I appreciate you all more than you know. Each and every note and letter I get is going in the pocket inside my husbands heart tomorrow and all the good wishes and prayers will be going thru that PET Scan as well and I hope they come out on the other side with just ONE day of GOOD news. 
If not...